So, I have decided to start posting again. Because I need this. I need focus in my life right now. Oh, I have had plenty of focus on some things, like basketball.This year I have been determined to get on varsity, so I have been practicing and conditioning my tail off and it has worked. My skills are improving and I think I might get moved up. But while my basketball skills have been on a up hill, my relationship with God has been more of a down hill slide. It scares me, because it took a friend of mine posting on her own blog about it to make me realize it too.
Really this post is like a second part to my previous one. But I have been struggling with the same battle it seems again and again. Rising up, falling down. Over and over. God drilling this one lesson into my skull because I can never seem to remember. We all have those math equations or science laws that we can't seem to remember no matter how much we grind them into our heads.
Like I said in my last post, sometimes I look at this beautiful world God has made and I feel like I do nothing but pollute his colorful portrait with my drab smudge of grey. Often it is so hard to believe that God does have a purpose for me, that he can make good come out of my life. No matter how much wrong I do.
Some lyrics to a song I really like go something like this:
Really this post is like a second part to my previous one. But I have been struggling with the same battle it seems again and again. Rising up, falling down. Over and over. God drilling this one lesson into my skull because I can never seem to remember. We all have those math equations or science laws that we can't seem to remember no matter how much we grind them into our heads.
Like I said in my last post, sometimes I look at this beautiful world God has made and I feel like I do nothing but pollute his colorful portrait with my drab smudge of grey. Often it is so hard to believe that God does have a purpose for me, that he can make good come out of my life. No matter how much wrong I do.
Some lyrics to a song I really like go something like this:
You are fearfully and wonderfully
a daughter of a The King,
You are perfect in the maker's eyes
even when you don't believe.
His blood poured out for who you are
not who you want to be.
We all have something we wish we could be. For me a pro-basketball player would pretty much be a dream come true, or a bestselling author. And you got to admit we all wish we could be someone that everyone likes. But God's blood poured out for who you are right now! Not that picture perfect person you wish you were and that you try to make the world believe you are. We're all princesses in God's eyes, darlin'. (Sorry could help but add that last bit of Grandmotherly wisdom)
God does have a plan for us, as frustratingly hidden as it might be, even if you can't believe that that can possibly be true right now. He does.
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